Dinner with the Gnome….

So last night as I was working the front desk with Ofc 80s Porn Star(really thats what he looks like not that I have seen 80s porn or anything lol) and he was like Kemeke ( he never says my name right) what are you doing for dinner? I told him nothing that I know of and he was like so maybe you would want to eat dinner with Ofc Gnome (not his real name but a very close description of him) and me. In my mind I’m thinking of all kinds of excuses to not eat dinner with them, but then it dawns on me this might be what we need to get real closure to the relationship that we had. So I sit and endure the jokes about the gnomes and my relationship, I hear all the beetle jokes (yes he drove a beetle, with personalized tags), the height jokes, the oreo jokes, etc. Granted I had not spoken to this man at all since December, the most I have had at communication was a slight wave, I had to speak to him over the phone one day when he called about some warrants to see if we had them in hand at the station. Since then though we have both been avoiding each other as much as possible. So finally I see that the Gnome is x-17 to the station. I go to the bathroom to fix my hair and put some chap stick on don’t want to look like a hot mess even though we are not together anymore. I call up the Princess to get her opinion of the situation, she laughs about and tell me that she wishes she could come in just to see this for herself. I keep thinking that this is going to be awkward, so I pretend I need something from my car and go sit in it for five minutes giving myself time to think about what am I going to say to him when I see him. I finally got the ovaries to go in there said bye to Princess, and walked in the break room and do you know what I did I started smiling. Like I know I looked  like a crazy person as much smiling I did as I walked to where they were sitting. I sat down and asked Ofc 80s P.S for a fork, I said hey to everyone and sat down and commenced to dig into my plain fried rice,wings, and a vegetable egg roll. All the things I thought I told myself I was going to say to this man slipped my mind as I put my focus on eating, and acting like the most amazing episode of American Dad was on. As I sat in silence they were talking it up about any and everything. So Ofc 80 P.S. starts talking to me and asking me about the probate that I went to at ECSU, he then asks me about the process to get into organizations, I tell him a brief synopsis. Then back to the quiet. So 10 minutes past of me focusing back on American Dad and then they make a comment about how this is how I am when I working the desk, and do you know who chimed in the Gnome. He was like yea I know, so now he has jokes. Then all of a sudden they go into a conversation about boxers and briefs and I can’t help but start laughing really hard to myself because all I can think about is him strolling around in his tightie whities, looking like a white buddha. He must know why I’m laughing at this point because he turns red as a tomato. So dinner continues with more comments about random stuff but then it keeps going back to how the gnome hates his fiance, how he doesn’t want to get married, he keeps telling 80s P.S that he can’t stand that bitch. In my head I’m just thinking why do people do this, they think that staying with a person they hate with that much passion is going to make the children’s lives any better no that will only make it worse. So they continue the bashing of his fiance and then I sense that dinner is almost over so I get up to throw some of my trash away really I was just giving him a 360 view of what he is now once again missing out on. So as they start talking about going to smoke I finally grow another pair of ovaries and tell Ofc Gnome that I never said anything bad about him, I tell him I never had a problem with him, his height, or anything about him. Then he asks me what about his car and I told him what I had told him when we first met why would I talk about your car when I always wanted a beetle, and 80s P.S. said well your a girl so that doesn’t count lol. The Gnome then tells me that he doesn’t want to give me any future blackmail information but that he was the happiest that he had ever been in his life when we were together, but he says that at least now he can see his son everyday. You know I understand that, really I do. Parents would do and endure anything for there children and thats what he is doing now. So over all my reunion dinner with Ofc Gnome was not as awkward as I made it out to be in my head.


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