Boyfriend/Girlfriend #2

In this world we have people and most have relationships with other people, but sometimes they may get unhappy, or just bored in said relationship. Then they go out and meet another person who they feel like is the missing piece to there puzzle or maybe they just need to unwind with something new. This is for all the boyfriend/girlfriend number 2‘s out there. The people who go into relationships with people knowing that they have major attachments already, or sometimes you don’t find out until its to late that they were just the side piece. 

 

Dear BF/GF #2,

 

                     You are the side dish, sidepiece, appetizer, whatever it is that you call your self nowadays. You are the person who only gets calls when your “friend” leaves the house, is at work, or is going home. You are the person in their phone by your last name, or maybe Bob and Jim when your really Beth and Sarah. You are the person who puts up with late night visits in lieu of real dates because you can’t be seen out in public with each other (unless your with somebody really bold, or you guys went to another town for your date). You ever notice that if yall do go somewhere you have to drive your car, or they meet you at the rendezvous (which probably only happens at night). You are the person who tells yourself that you can control your feelings for your “friend” but yet you get upset when they tell you they can’t call you for a couple of days because they are not in town. You sometimes find your self feeling as if you are getting neglected because your “friend” had to stay home with the BF/GF/Fiancé/Wife/Husband you get the point right. The thing is that you have a person who is selfish that wants their cake and eat it too. Your “friend” is getting the best of both worlds while you twiddle your thumbs in the hopes that they might text you tonight. You see that right there I said text because to actually call you would be to much, calling lets you hear emotion, you can read more from a voice conversation than from someone sending you a text about the same thing. How many times does it take you texting them for them to finally reply. When you do finally get together your “friend” only has one thing on their mind, they don’t want to know how your week (because its probably been a week since you last seen them, hey you can’t be late home everyday) has been, if you finally got that raise at work, they are there for one thing only-to get some and bounce. Sometimes you may get the ones who have true emotions for you and who really want to care about you, who may even love you in their own little warped way, but are stuck in a situation where its best to be in a place where they feel the most pain, than be with the person who truly makes them happy. Those situations are the ones were it will leave you in the worst shape. With every bit of emotion they show towards you, you will find yourself giving it back two fold. You will do this because you want them to see that you are better than the person they are with, that the feelings that they feel when they are around you can only be caused by you. But the reality is that they will never leave their BF/GF/Wife/Husband/Fiancé for you. You my friend will always be the cube steak to the filet minion they have at home. Don’t get me wrong cube steak is good, but filet minion is better. That person they leave at home for you, has something about them that makes them constantly go back them. They have some need that only their BF/GF/Wife/Husband/Fiancé can help or fix, whether it be a child, finances, a home, cars, family ties, hell even a job sometimes(bosses need love too). Do you know what comes from being a BF/GF #2 nothing but heartache, regret, and unrequited love. But even when people know all these things they still put themselves thru the motions of this elaborate game. They still carry that small flame in their heart that one day their “friend” will allow them to take the place of BF/GF/Wife/Husband/Fiancé #1, and if it does happen what makes you think that when yall get together that there won’t be a new BF/GF/Wife/Husband/Fiancé #2.

 

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Mr. TxtBrkrUpr

Dear Text Break upper,

 

            So it’s been a while since I have spoken to you but really did you ever really hear my voice in the first place. You sir enjoyed the simplicity and the non scariness of texting versus phone conversation.  I had to change my plan to unlimited with the amount of texts I was getting from you. I mean with the job that you have and that I will have you can’t really be on the phone all the time. So  I’m not saying that I didn’t enjoy the random winks, walk bys, giggles, etc that would pass between us….but alas it wasn’t meant to be. After reading Damon’s blog at Thismayconcernyou.com I decided it was time to really finally put this thing to rest. You Mr. Text Breaker upper you hurt me in 130 words or less. I sat and ridiculed myself countless times trying to decipher the flaws that I must have to make you have the audacity to end it the way you did. Over the months I have came to the realization that you and I were not right for each other. You see I’m glad that we got to be together but I knew that it wouldn’t have worked out for the best. One, you smoke and I didn’t realize this when we first started dating/talking because I never smelled the cancer sticks, but once I realized that you have to smoke every night before you went to bed then yea that wasn’t a good sign I want to live. Two, people with attachment issues are just not great to be in a relationship with. You had way too many attachments that would have only had me jealous or yearning for something more half the time than really enjoying the relationship. Three, dating people you work with is always a tricky situation. I know me I get excited about things and then I tell my friends, who then get more excited and tell their friends and now look everyone knows that we are dating. So then they start watching you and trying to find flaws or see if you come in happy or sad, and then there is that akward phase of trying to ignore each other it’s just ridiculous really. Four, religion plays a major part in my life my father’s a preacher, my mother’s a deaconess, my grandparents were elders of their churches. I’m just at the point in my life where I’m trying to really see where I fit in my religion and you being the anti religion, anti god person you are it would have been nothing but arguments if ever you would have come around my family. But even though it didn’t work out I’m glad I did get the opportunity to date a man who appreciates a woman, a man who isn’t afraid to tell you look beautiful in the mornings, one who loves being a man, opening doors, walks on the beach, walks down town, that slight cockiness that you possessed, the way your smile is kinda crooked, the way you would look at me before you left or went to sleep, see you showing me these things has only made me want to have them in my next relationship. You see Mr. Text breaker upper you showed me the yin and the yang of how I want my relationships to be like. You showed me that I didn’t need some big tall guy that is more focused on his self. I need someone who wants to love me and will do anything to keep that love with me. You showed me that even as you ended it with me to go back to someone with whom you had history with. You showed me that it should be a requirement for a man to text/call you at random times of the day just to tell you that you’re beautiful, that thinking about you made their day better, that they can’t stop thinking about the way you walk, that they just love everything about you. You showed me a man should want to be out in public with you, that you can just walk and have a good time, that you didn’t just have to sit in a house all day and just watch TV. You showed me the power of love to pull you back to the things that really matter the most to you. In a way I found myself with you. So to you Mr. TxtBrkrUpr thanks again for the love you showed me and the pain you put me thru. It all worked out in the end.

 

Sincerely,

Turtle

Dinner with the Gnome….

So last night as I was working the front desk with Ofc 80s Porn Star(really thats what he looks like not that I have seen 80s porn or anything lol) and he was like Kemeke ( he never says my name right) what are you doing for dinner? I told him nothing that I know of and he was like so maybe you would want to eat dinner with Ofc Gnome (not his real name but a very close description of him) and me. In my mind I’m thinking of all kinds of excuses to not eat dinner with them, but then it dawns on me this might be what we need to get real closure to the relationship that we had. So I sit and endure the jokes about the gnomes and my relationship, I hear all the beetle jokes (yes he drove a beetle, with personalized tags), the height jokes, the oreo jokes, etc. Granted I had not spoken to this man at all since December, the most I have had at communication was a slight wave, I had to speak to him over the phone one day when he called about some warrants to see if we had them in hand at the station. Since then though we have both been avoiding each other as much as possible. So finally I see that the Gnome is x-17 to the station. I go to the bathroom to fix my hair and put some chap stick on don’t want to look like a hot mess even though we are not together anymore. I call up the Princess to get her opinion of the situation, she laughs about and tell me that she wishes she could come in just to see this for herself. I keep thinking that this is going to be awkward, so I pretend I need something from my car and go sit in it for five minutes giving myself time to think about what am I going to say to him when I see him. I finally got the ovaries to go in there said bye to Princess, and walked in the break room and do you know what I did I started smiling. Like I know I looked  like a crazy person as much smiling I did as I walked to where they were sitting. I sat down and asked Ofc 80s P.S for a fork, I said hey to everyone and sat down and commenced to dig into my plain fried rice,wings, and a vegetable egg roll. All the things I thought I told myself I was going to say to this man slipped my mind as I put my focus on eating, and acting like the most amazing episode of American Dad was on. As I sat in silence they were talking it up about any and everything. So Ofc 80 P.S. starts talking to me and asking me about the probate that I went to at ECSU, he then asks me about the process to get into organizations, I tell him a brief synopsis. Then back to the quiet. So 10 minutes past of me focusing back on American Dad and then they make a comment about how this is how I am when I working the desk, and do you know who chimed in the Gnome. He was like yea I know, so now he has jokes. Then all of a sudden they go into a conversation about boxers and briefs and I can’t help but start laughing really hard to myself because all I can think about is him strolling around in his tightie whities, looking like a white buddha. He must know why I’m laughing at this point because he turns red as a tomato. So dinner continues with more comments about random stuff but then it keeps going back to how the gnome hates his fiance, how he doesn’t want to get married, he keeps telling 80s P.S that he can’t stand that bitch. In my head I’m just thinking why do people do this, they think that staying with a person they hate with that much passion is going to make the children’s lives any better no that will only make it worse. So they continue the bashing of his fiance and then I sense that dinner is almost over so I get up to throw some of my trash away really I was just giving him a 360 view of what he is now once again missing out on. So as they start talking about going to smoke I finally grow another pair of ovaries and tell Ofc Gnome that I never said anything bad about him, I tell him I never had a problem with him, his height, or anything about him. Then he asks me what about his car and I told him what I had told him when we first met why would I talk about your car when I always wanted a beetle, and 80s P.S. said well your a girl so that doesn’t count lol. The Gnome then tells me that he doesn’t want to give me any future blackmail information but that he was the happiest that he had ever been in his life when we were together, but he says that at least now he can see his son everyday. You know I understand that, really I do. Parents would do and endure anything for there children and thats what he is doing now. So over all my reunion dinner with Ofc Gnome was not as awkward as I made it out to be in my head.